Sooooo, its been a few days. Been tossin and turnin what to put out there, i started my journey inward but now I'm not too sure what to express outwardly from that.
Yesterday while I was at the pool soakin in some good ol' vitamin D and reading while the kids played in the pool I kinda had a big revelation, a change of perspective if you will. Man, thats a word Ive been hearing a lot of lately, and I mean A LOT of, which is good. I was reading a Blessed Life, by whoever wrote it, its good and its right up my alley, talking about finances. I really like the approach used though, as it is more a reflection of the heart in finances and motives, not to get anything in return. When I came across the section that was talking about mammon for whatever reason I saw it in new light. You see mammon is in my words the root of all evil, not money, mammon is greed. When I read it i stopped to really search myself, who am I serving?, and then I heard my voice in my head, "my only stress is money, I only stress when there is no money, if I only made 10k more a year....". Wow, I was serving mammon. When I came to this I started evaluating my money spent, and what they say about me. Then a verse popped into my mind, a line from Proverbs 26,
11 As a dog returns to its vomit, so fools repeat their folly.
I dont want to be a fool, I dont want to be a dog eating my own vomit, it cant taste good, it cant be nutritious, why would anyone want to return and eat their own mess they made? So quite simply I had a change of heart at that moment, a change of heart on how I view finances, or what I spend, on what, and for what reasons. It must've been the good 'ol Vitamin D that help get the wires connected right to have an "AH HA" moment.
After that moment I had another hop skip and a jump to a verse that has been kicking me in the teeth lately. You find it in 1 Corinthians 6
19 Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; 20 you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies.
I know what context this is in, but in relation to money, were my spending habits in line with this? Were things I spent my money on building my body up, or tearing it down. That was the second part to my change of perspective I had. I have in the past had spending habits and mentality that served mammon.
I cannot change what I've done in the past, I cannot change where I am at. I can change what i will do now, I can change where i am going.
Yesterday as I was walking deep inside myself I came to a fork in the road, a fork I had not seen before, before the light was barely enough to see my hand in front of my face. Yesterday as I was walking deep inside myself I received the gift of light which helped me choose the right.
It is what it is, and this be it
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